In Your Debt I Live (song series)

I am certainly not immune to the frustrations in service to Christ.  I often find I make it about me…sometimes so subtly that I may not even see it clearly or deny it all together. There are times that I feel like I am aching for “encouragement” from others as a source of validation of my giftednes. My insides beg to hear if I am doing a good job…which again…is all about me.  See a trend here? I continue to serve as the war rages within…whether I fight with the lies of inadequacy that try to diminish my faith, or fight with my pride that tries to make it about me and my abilites.  It can be tough to truly feel passionate about where I serve God –not used enough –not used in the right place, etc. I have to remind myself often that just because I may think I am gifted in something…doesn’t mean that is where God wants to use me at that moment… and IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!  I have been guilty also of looking so hard at an area I want to serve that I neglect to see what God may be leading me to do.  My blog posts sharing my music is a prime example. It took me a while to share…and I still struggle to wonder if many listen…but God will lead listeners as He sees fit. I will remain obedient in the sharing.

 But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you.

1 Samuel 12:24

So, we serve with vitality.  We are called to be servants…this is not our home, we are not our own…we are His and He is deserving of our everything.

For the abilities we have been given should rightfully return to the Giver!

Click HERE to listen to "In Your Debt I Live" AUDIO

In Your Debt I Live

Becki J. Buescher

Will I sing if no voice is found in me

Will I dance if these legs have no strength

Will I go if comfort grips me

Will I serve if no one sees but You

Search my heart

Show Your face

Find me longing for your grace

May I loosely hold the gifts you give

In Your debt I live

Will I still give if all is taken away from me

If I am chosen last, will my heart break

Will I still worship wholeheartedly

If it’s just you and me

Who am I undeserving

Who am I nothing apart

Who am I that you would save me

Who am I for you 

Linger Here (song series)

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
 will abide in the shadow of the Almighty…

Psalm 91:1

Hear my cry, O God, 
listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint. 
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I, for you have been my refuge, 
a strong tower against the enemy.

Let me dwell in your tent forever! Let me take refuge under the shelter of your wings!

Psalm 61:1-4

I had a phenomenal opportunity to study abroad in Australia for a semester in college.  During that time I took an extended trip to the “red center” near Alice Springs to visit Uluru (Ayer’s rock).  Many have seen pictures of this iconic monolith, but NOTHING compares to seeing this structure in person. It is one solid rock that is over 1000 feet high and over 2 miles long over 1 mile wide and almost 6 miles around its base. The amazing thing is its size is several times greater under the ground!  Around its perimeter are waterfalls and caves which held, what was estimated, a foot thickness of aboriginal cave drawings.  I had the privilege of walking around this landmark and climbing to the top (it was so steep it left my legs achy for days!)  The red and cratered surface made me feel I was walking on mars!

Uluru gave me just a glimpse of the power, beauty, strength, and protection of God in this vast desert wasteland.  His greatness is immeasurable and incomprehensible. And what lies beneath the extent we perceive of God…Heaven only knows…no really, Heaven only holds such understanding!

I wrote this song as a response to the protection of God…sometimes seemingly harsh, but as tough love sometimes dictates…for our best interest.  He is our strength and shield and our strong tower…our ROCK…our fortress - a place to dwell…forever.

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,

for my hope is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken.

On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God.

Psalm 62:5-7

Click HERE to listen to "Linger Here" AUDIO

Linger Here

Becki J Buescher

Darkness falls on me

I find that it’s Your shadow

Not to harm or destroy

To guard me from my foes

I know that You are here to help me

The battle's been so trying

I am broken down

I need You now

You are my Strong Tower
May Your shadow rest on me, rest on me
A secret place to dwell
Sheltered from all rival
May I linger here, linger here

What I thought to be abandon

I found to be solace

Darkness illuminated

Brighter than the sun

Joy revealed through sorrow

Hope triumphs despair

Within your sovereignty

May I dwell here? 

The Passion of Christ (song series)

"He was despised and rejected by men;
    a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief;
and as one from whom men hide their faces 
he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

Surely he has borne our grief
and carried our sorrows;
yet we esteemed him stricken,
smitten by God, and afflicted.

But he was pierced for our transgressions;
he was crushed for our iniquities;
upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace,
and with his wounds we are healed.

All we like sheep have gone astray;
we have turned—every one—to his own way;
and the Lord has laid on him
the iniquity of us all."
Isaiah 53:3-6

Click HERE to listen to "The Passion of Christ" AUDIO

The Passion of Christ

Becki J. Buescher
guitar by David Halvorson and Tim Painter

Thirty-three years finds me here, a life worth thirty silver morsels of remorse.
“Crucify him” rang from their lips and their hardened hearts.

Echoing in my ears, from those who paved my steps just days before

No sparing of my skin or the pain that I am in, their words slice through my soul

·     God give me strength, mask this pain, physical shame, how could they curse Your name?

The thorns pierce to a depth I’ve never known before
Thrown upon a cross, fulfilling this vulgar atrocity

These nails will never pierce my love for you, 

I will endure all torture you put me through - just to save you.

Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.

Their blinded eyes cannot see that this is the only way

My heart fails to comprehend all the weight that it now bears, my body is failing fast.

Shallow breaths now strain from my chest; my arms have no more strength

I’m crying out inside for my Father to never leave my side. 

I fear the looming torment drawing near

Within a moment weight of all mankind fall upon my heart.  
Please Father don’t leave me!

How could they hate me? Why does this have to be?
My God, oh God why have You forsaken me?

Has my Father felt the sorrow my soul suffers inside, How could he turn His back on me?

He suffers as I, He has to watch His beloved die

Tears could never wash away the pain felt on this day, will you remember me?

The beauty of my life is yet to come, will you follow me?

With every ounce within my soul I commit my spirit to thee, It is Finished.

Depart From Me (song series)

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen. 

1 Peter 5:8-11

Be alert. Be mindful.  he is real and he does aim to destroy our faith, our hopes, and our lives.  his effects on us are subtle and alluring.  he loves to target us when we are active and strong in our faith too.  For what kind of threat are we to his existence and plan when we are stagnant?

Satan is not a fairy tale. 

he is not made up just to scare us to be good. A real fallen creation and certain threat to our relationship to Christ.  

BUT…WE ARE PURCHASED BY CHRIST'S BLOOD! 

We are saved and freed from the pits if we claim to believe and know and trust in our Lord Jesus Christ.  He is the victor…He has won…and We are HIS!

We will still struggle. We are not immune...in fact, we are targets.  But through Him, Christ our Savior, we can conquer whatever tries to pull us down!

 Click HERE to listen to "Depart from me" AUDIO

Depart from Me

Becki J. Buescher

I hear the voices, inaudible sounds

Prompting me to follow

To believe what I feel selfishly desire

What I think I deserve

But I know it's lies they serve

My eyes gaze to all that she has

Comparing, consuming my heart

I’ll never measure up, not pretty enough

I believe that lie, not this time.

Depart from me, you’re not welcome anymore
Nothing gives you the right
Only God has control, and I think you should go     
and don’t you dare try and steal my life from me

When my thoughts are eager for praise of man

So I lay down my heart

But I still wait for an accolade

To determine my worth, define who I am

All the weakness conceals which my image reveals

Taking charge of my thoughts

Where is my self-control as despair takes its toll

And I give in one more time

Why do I believe I’m worthless?

Who am I to receive a purpose?

I feel chained to mistakes

God already freed me from this